Screen Time: How Do I Get My Kid Off the Tablet?
The magical tablet. The piece of equipment that makes children’s eyes light up with wonder and parents’ hearts soar as they realize they might get to eat a meal in peace, fold a load of laundry, or just stare at the wall for a bit at the end of the day. The purpose of this post is not to shame you in to donating your kids tablets to charity or feel guilty about just needing a few minutes to cook dinner, or shower. Parents today have so many wonderful tools at our fingertips that our own parents did not and I am prepared to take full advantage of them, especially since “go outside and play with your friends and come in when the streetlights come on” is not something we’re allowed to say to our children like our parents said to us. Times have changed, kids have changed, we now have tablets.
I am a full proponent of kids using tablets. In this day in age kids are doing homework on their computers and physical textbooks are going to be faded out in our kids’ lifetime. They are going to need to know how to operate these devices and there are some really great educational games available on all of the tablets, I’ve seen some wonderful things happen because of this. In fact, many of my non-verbal clients have learned how to communicate through apps on tablets which has been such a great leap forward in inclusivity for the autism community because what kid doesn’t walk around with a tablet these days?
Where things get a little difficult is when it’s time to put the tablet away. Hell hath no fury like a toddler whose tablet has just been taken away. I’ve put together a few helpful tips to minimize tablet time and help make a seamless transition on and off of it.
For starters, tablet time should be earned. Tablet time is not a right; it is a reward. Where I’ve seen many systems fail is when the kid gets home from school and is given some tablet time to unwind before doing homework or chores. When it’s time to put the tablet down to do homework, or eat dinner, or go to bed, tantrums are bound do ensue. Why am I going to give up this magical unicorn of joy to do my math?
Kids thrive on routine, and it’s even better when the end of the routine is met with some kind of reinforcement. Setting up an after-school schedule and posting it where your child can see it can help them see what they need to be doing, and that they are making progress closer to their goal. In our house, and something I highly recommend to all parents, we use a token economy system. My toddler earns “tokens” based on good behavior and once she has earned 5 of them can cash them in for a prize or time on the tablet. This gives her a sense of accomplishment and the feeling that she has earned her reward. For more info on how to implement a token system in your own home, call or email and I’d be more than happy to help!
Once chores are completed, tablet time is earned which brings me to my second point: consistency. I’m not about to tell you how much time your child should or should not spend looking at a screen, but the American Heart Association recommends no more than 2 hours for kids ages 5 and older, and one hour per day for the 3-5 crowd. If your child gets 2 hours on the tablet on Tuesday and then gets 20 minutes on Wednesday, I guarantee the words “that’s not fair!” will be yelled at you. Set timers, tell your child how much time they get (try to keep that time consistent) and put the tablet away when the timer goes off. No exceptions. Some apps have automatic shut off functions. Using the parental control features on the tablet can absolutely be your friend. Some of them will disable a particular app after a predetermined amount of time so only educational apps are available after the time is up, or the tablet itself is unavailable after time is up. This feature is great because when time is up it’s not the parent turning it off, it’s the timer itself, which then can be blamed instead of you! I highly recommend exploring the vast universe of parental controls.
My last point here is going to be a quick note on screen time and its affect on healthy sleep patterns. Screens of all kinds from our phones and televisions to tablets emit blue light, and studies show that exposure to blue light in the hour to two hours before sleep can affect our bodies ability to fall asleep and even affect the quality of the sleep we are getting. Cell phone makers have gotten wise to this fact and have features to block blue light in the evening hours, if you haven’t already I suggest looking in to this feature on your own phone and tablet. Adults and children alike should be really trying to reduce screen time in the two hours before bed and eliminating it completely in the hour before bed. By setting up these expectations in our kids at a young age can help them to develop healthy habits with screens that they will carry through with them as they get older.
If you’re struggling with limiting the amount of screen time your child is getting and need some help in coming up with a game plan, I’m here for you! In the meantime, I’ll just be scrolling my Instagram feed…
AHA’s recommendations for screen time in children:
Blue light and healthy sleep patterns:
https://www.sciencenewsforstudents.org/article/evening-screen-time-can-sabotage-sleep